Dearest readers,

We are delighted to announce our residency as SSE’s much needed agony aunts.

Relationships and romance are tough in Stockholm but, lucky for you, we are here to help. Assuming the role of your closest confidant and friend, we will navigate the expansive web of relationships on a campus so small you’ve met everyone and their mother.

Seasoned with first dates, friendship trifles, and family debates, we are professionally (in a loose sense of the term) qualified to provide you with life-changing advice that can turn your bland morning coffee into a bold espresso martini.

This is a judgment-free zone. Vent out all of your relationship frustrations, romantic or otherwise—tell us as much as you want or as little, but be guaranteed incredible advice.

As professional hot singles, we take our job seriously.

I, Salina, have had my share of long-term crushes, short-term situationships, and many conversations with 20-somethings at The Blues Kitchen in Shoreditch, London. As someone who prides herself in education and academics, I am taking a step back from ‘neekism’ and am using my intelligence into something I am very good at: relationships. Of course, I’ve never been in one myself (currently getting over a crush who said he’s “not looking for a relationship right now” by swiping on Hinge). However, absorbing the experiences of my past roommates and friends who have had their own relationship troubles, I can attest to the fact that my advice is unbeatable (and quite fuckass).

I am your other esteemed aunt, Marina. Revered as the first port of call for all of my friend’s relationship struggles I’ve helped navigate everything from psycho exes to shy crushes. Still looking for my ‘Mr Big’, I can relate to the struggle of finding true romance in the world of hookup culture, ‘experimentation’, and FwB. Whilst the dating scene can get you down, I know there is nothing more beautiful than getting drinks or rewatching TVD at 3am with your closest friends. I encourage you to have fun, stay open minded and believe that the right people will come to you.

To highlight the vast depths of our experience, we’ve reached out to some of our closest friends:

Lucy: It’s thanks to Marina I've got not one, not two but THREE ex-husbands and I couldn't be happier!

Ella: Salina has always made me feel seen. Learning from her academic experience, I am now able to see the direct correlation between fucking around and finding out.

Adrian: The Aunts helped me come to terms with my sexuality, I’m now out the closet and a proud member of my polygamous throuple.

Erik: Marina encouraged me to take hold of my passions at an underwater aerobics class for undiagnosed sociopaths, it was because of her I met the love of my life.

Alara: Salina convinced me to break up with my long-term long-distance boyfriend because while everything else was long, something wasn’t.

Uni IS the friends you made along the way. We encourage you to stay entertained on your deathbed by making the most of university, creating fun, lasting memories. We are excited to get in touch with you all and start stirring the stale pot of SSE’s relationship dramas.

Submit to our column through this link or through the weekly IG story prompt on @minimax.sasse for revelatory, life changing advice. The more info, the merrier.

Take us with a pinch of SSE salt,

Salina and Marina xx